Parents often ask the question "is this normal?" I'm here to help!
The most common question I’ve received in my 16 years of professional experience is:
“Is this normal?”
It’s a concern that spans all three continents in which I’ve worked with children and families – North America, Africa, and Europe.
Unfortunately, the pandemic has limited our resources for finding individualized answers.
We don’t attend parenting groups, such as Mommy & Me or Daddy & Me, like we used to.
We don’t take part in expectant parent workshops like we used to.
Nor do we gather with older generations or even go to pediatricians like we used to.
Each of those places was an opportunity to connect one-on-one with another parent or knowledgeable voice and ask our questions and voice our worries.
That’s why the “personalized” in Beyond Book Parenting’s tagline of “personalized parenting support for thriving babies” is so important. I’m here to meet and talk with you about your experience. My passion for reassuring and guiding and giving more information exists, in part, because the information that's out there is overwhelming (especially now, at this moment in time)! Every publication seems to have a different philosophy and theirs is the "right" philosophy and every mommy blog or Facebook parent group will spout the developmental milestones that must be met by this month and this month ONLY. There’s no nuance, no voice even to the slightly-different.
Those monthly milestones? They're not black and white.
Not every baby grows the same way! Just because a baby prefers to scoot on her bottom instead of crawl doesn't mean she's not going to walk. If a baby is struggling to adjust to solid foods doesn't mean he's never going to eat solid foods. And just because a baby catnaps during the day doesn't mean they're not getting enough rest.
Websites and books and blogs are constantly shouting different messages and it can be hard for parents to hear their own voices. To think beyond what you’re reading. Being a good parent doesn't necessarily mean taking everyone's advice; it means being in tune with your baby to know what their individual baby needs.
I often think that the question "is this normal?" should be replaced with:
"Does this work for me and my baby?"
And while it may take awhile to figure out, each parent is capable of getting there. Finding your own truth. Your own parenthood path. Your own joy in parenting.
I’m here to help that process along.
In the next series of posts, I’ll write about – and we will discuss! – how we think of infant development. Stay tuned…
